In a recent post on this blog, titled “Dirty Sluts in America,” Chellebell argues that women are pressured to “engage in sex to fit in, but once they have sex, their peers bash them.” After reading the article, the question that bogs my mind is why sex is generally acceptable for men and not for women. Why in particular are women so often shamed for engaging in premarital sex? I mean, why aren’t women just as entitled as men to make decisions for themselves when it comes to their own sex lives. . .
Not only does slut shaming occur in the United States, but a recent article explores this phenomena in Turkey (here). In the prosaically titled “Ambivalent Sexism and Attitudes toward Women who Engage in Premarital Sex in Turkey,” Nuray Sakali-Ugurlu and Peter Glick observe the sexual double standard that women are pressured and ridiculed when they engage in premarital sex while men are not. They argue that “women who are known to have engaged in premarital sex are not only disrespected but may face myriad forms of discrimination, including serious social and family problems” and such women undergo “involuntary virginity examinations, surgical reconstruction of the hymen, and physical abuse for failing to ‘protect’ their virginity.” Whether in Turkey or the United States, it is my view that women are independent individuals whose sexual ideas and desires should be respected. The disrespect directed toward women who have premarital sex not only demonstrates a double standard, but shows a broader pattern of discrimination against women. Attacks on the rights of women to make choices for themselves about their bodies reveal how vulnerable women are, and the fact that this standard is applied unequally for men and women demonstrates that we are still living in a patriarchal society. To take the analysis a bit further, I think it is important to understand that the double standard applied to women is bound up with hegemonic masculinity. In other words, men ridicule women for having premarital sex, but at the same time, they often depend on having premarital sex with women in order to achieve their masculinity. In this light, a woman’s choice about who she wants to have sex with and when she wants to do it is scrutinized and ridiculed because men depend on it for their own masculinity. It is important to highlight that even though masculinity is hegemonic, women retain a measure of control. Ironically, women are centrally involved in the production of hegemonic masculinity, which in turn, subjects women to a sexual double standard. By this logic, women are co-creators of the system that imprisons them, and if this is true, then it stands to reason that women have a direct way to intervene on the production of hegemonic masculinity. Women have agency, and they aren’t just the victims Chellebell seems to take them for. Unfortunately, exercising this agency is not without its consequences. Women are raped every day for daring to decide for themselves the terms of their sex with men. It is often stated that rape is more about power and control than sex. I think women fall victim to rape because they are attempting to exercise their agency in denying sex with men who seek to realize their masculinity. They are, in effect, attempting to wrestle power away from men. ~ Wenty
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AuthorsThe Class Blog Project, or CBP, is a blog featuring undergraduate students forming a critical dialogue with each other around ideas related to the sociology of gender. Archives
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